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I often fear what
I don’t know.
I get the feeling that life’s greatest moments of bliss, life’s most loving surprises are built into the unknown. I get the feeling that the unknown is what shows up in the face of the ultimate egotistical moment and smacks me right back down.
And yet, I don’t really know.
I look at myself in the mirror, I smile. Am I happy? I look at a picture, the people are smiling, are they happy?
I don’t know.
I schedule my day, my life, this hour. I prepare for joy, for sorrow, for … something.
I don’t really know.
The past is a story. I look back and find meaning for the future. What will I learn if and when I do this again?
I don’t know.
The future, is it as determined as the past? It comes, again and again and again. It’s here now, now I mean now, no now, now, now, now.
Ugh, I don’t know!
I’m convinced that something won’t come, won’t happen, but then it does. My mind is blown! I’m ecstatic and outside of myself. Joy, pure joy, stemming from
I don’t know.
I’m convinced that I know what I cannot know. Maybe not the details, but in general. I know what I do know and, thus, the rest is what
I don’t know.
The project is done, the presentation coming to a close. The hand raised. A question asked. The answer
I don’t know.
A quest is a journey. The destination
I don’t know.
By now, it’s obvious, I don’t have all the answers. Do you?
I don’t know.
But together, the I don’t know is smaller and,
I don’t know,
but somehow that simple fact puts a smile on my face, tears of joy sparkle in my eye, I grab your hand, we face the world together and I’m able to say with less fear and more excitement,
“I don’t know.”
mfackenthal 